Sunday, April 09, 2006
Tired of mousy attempts at business
Maybe it's just me, but I am tired of these half hearted, half assed attempts at running businesses. They say that women are starting businesses at twice the rate of men, but my question is - if this is true - where are they?
As a business owner, striving for excellence in what I do, I run into women daily who also have their own businesses. The problem is with many of them is that they do not take these businesses seriously. They claim that they want success, but their actions defy their words.
"I can't make it - I have to take Billy to a birthday party". "Oh geeze, that is the night that the kids have soccer - I am going to have to pass on that meeting"
I have never heard these comments come from a man who owns his own business.
Women pride themselves on the ability to multitask, but I often wonder if this in the end will be cause for their demise in the entrepreneurial world. Trying to do it all, and be everything to everyone results in lack of focus.
My father was a good - maybe not great - but good business man. I recall he was absent on business trips, and sometimes worked late. I accepted that for us to have food on the table, he sometimes could not be by my side at soccer games, recitals and other events. He sometimes was absent at the dinner table. But I knew he cared about me. Coming from a farming background, I also understood that there were times that work was more important than play. 'Make hay while the sun shines' was a common phrase in out family.
Could it be that we are really playing at business and still relying on our spouses financial support? Would we be more committed if we had to balance the books and show a healthy profit every year? Would we miss that little league game a couple of times if our family's financial future depended on us attending a meeting or event?
Perhaps it is time for women in business to recognize that to achieve success with their businesses it is going to require committment. That might mean that they need to have less guilt and more organization when it comes to missing family or community events.
Missing a learning or networking opportunity for a soccer game or birthday party reveals the level of committment to success of the business. Try explaining that to your banker next time you need a business loan.
For more articles like this please visit http://www.roaringwomen.com
Mandie Crawford
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8 comments:
I think that a lot of women start their own businesses so that they can have the freedom to be with their kids. However, that doesn't mean that I don't see your point. I am often the only one from my company to attend evening events because everyone else is rushing home to get to soccer practice on time.
To be successful, whether as a business owner, or sales person, one has to make the decision to work hard. I have chosen not to limit my success by missing out on great educational or networking activies. By saying "no" these women are not only limiting their success, but their income as well.
I agree that not everyone puts their "all" into their business, and I prefer to work with people that are very dedicated to their own success. But I don't think that because you choose your family over a networking event you should be judged for that! And just because men have done it for years doesn't mean it is right.
To be successful in business, I believe networking is of utmost importance. And I believe a business plan or marketing plan should include a networking plan. Define how many networking events you will attend each month. Define how many contacts you intend to make at each event. And definitely define your follow up strategy for the contacts you make. Track what works to bring you business. If you have an overall plan, then putting your children first when you are still meeting your goals, should be acceptable.
Further, I think Billy’s birthday party can be a networking opportunity, as can every interaction we have with others.
But I also want to say if you have joined a networking group – or any group for that matter - then I think it is your business & personal responsibility to attend every possible event. If you are unable to uphold this commitment, how can the other members ensure you can uphold the commitment you make to them or the referrals they may give you!
I hope that people can look for balance in their lives, while working for someone else or working for themselves. I believe that it is imperative that we live our own goals and values, and not those decided for us by the masses.
I truly believe we can put both our families and our businesses first - and we can find success in both.
S Sterkel
I appreciate that as business owners/business people we need to be committed to our work. However, I constatantly come up with the conflict of being a mother and a business woman. We live in a society that demonstrates that it wants our professional lifes to come before our families. What is the cost of this in the long run for our children. Can we not create an understanding for and, consequently, space for the needs of our children? As a single mom, I appreciate I need to work and be professional. However,I end up being torn in two by it. Is it possible to create a society where families and children are valued at least equal to our professional lifes? - where it is not about the bottem dollar and the making of it that comes first? I have this dream that women will stand up for women - and what it means to be a women. A big part of our lifes, for many of us, is the raising of children. We talk about the fact that we are caretakers, should we not take care of each other and support each other in the many facets of our lifes - of what it means to be a woman? I think we are falling into the pattern set by men in the business world - which we often criticize. How are we changing that? I believe things will not change until women stand up for women, and we create a different paradigm. I don't know what the answer is, but these are the thoughts that run thru my mind so often these days.
I did agree on some of the points in the article about making their business a priority. However it's very difficult to balance business, family, and work committments. Let me give you an example of my personal situation.
I've received many new customers and repeat customers in my business. I also still work at my job from 2am to 10am full-time, so I wake up at 1 in the morning to go to work.
I'm not qualified to get additional financing because I'm trying to pay off my credit cards from my personal debt. Our family has a very tight budget. We have a 4 year old son. My husband works from 2pm to 11pm, so we don't have to pay for childcare expenses. We can't afford to hire a baby-sitter on a perminent basis. The rest of the time I work on my business. Fortunately I have a couple of friends who help in some of the administrative tasks in the business because I don't have the budget to hire any staff.
I belong to the local Chamber of Commerce where they have networking events in the evenings. I try to attend the events when I can. However I have to pay for a babysitter and usually I have to take either public transit, a taxi, or rely on a friend to come with me to get to the event because my husband uses our only car to get to work.
Before Christmas when it's my busy season, I was only getting about 2-3 hours sleep at the most. Because of this, my health was compromised and have become so run-down that I've developed bronchitis and constant colds/fatigue.
The reason why I mentioning all this is because many women who are starting and growing their business are facing huge obstacles. Whether it's financial, their work schedules, having young children.
Just because they can't attend every networking event doesn't mean that they aren't serious about their business. There's always a question of balance in all of our lives and sometimes we also have to take care of ourselves. Otherwise we can't take care of others properly.
In fact many of the people that I met in the networking functions are very understanding and express
sympathy for my situation. Many of my customers also understand as well because they are also moms in the same situation.
Instead of making moms feel guily and judging them, why not be supportive of one another.
In my industry,network marketing, there are alot of "joiners". They are people, of both sexes, who like the idea of being an entrepreneur, but have no honest concept of what the committment is for success. They join and as soon as they hit the first bump in the road, they return to their comfort zone and call the industry down.
Regardless of whether you are attempting a traditional business,direct sales or network marketing business, it is going to take effort. Those that succeed take the "Slight Edge Effect", doing what 90% of the people don't do to make their business grow. A habit of success is the final difference that will work most of the time. It is daily behaviors that create long term results.
As a busy Mom, I can appreciate the challenges of time. But is that not all the more reason to dig down and do the 'tough work' in the beginning. Get moving down the run way at the right speed so that your plane will take off, otherwise your plane is going to crash and burn. Go the extra mile in some way each day, be there mentally with persistance and an unwavering committment to your WHY and you will reach your goals. Good luck...
It is interesting to see the struggle between the traditional business attitudes and what is emerging in this new century. The processes for developing and maintaining a business have changed so much that we are very much brave new world. Roaring Women is a case in point, eh?
Anyway, perhaps a once- or twice-a-year family-style event is a way to introduce your family to your networking/business group, and vice versa. Or perhaps we need to look at our organization's scheduling expectations, i.e., are they really meeting the needs of the members?
And, for heaven's sake, our kids are probably quite capable of arranging occasional transportation with school friends and team mates.I occasionally needed to remind myself when my girls were growing up without a dad, that if Isabella could run Spain at the age of 8 and finance a business venture to the States against the advice of her councilors, and Henry's kid Elizabeth could build a global empire, then my daughters could certainly do their own laundry and get themselves the five blocks to school for a sports practice. They need to be trusted, and to learn independent action. And if you can't make it to a meeting once in a while, then so be it. Your business won't fail on the basis of one networking event. But it will fail if you stretch yourself too thin.
As a mom and a business owner, I know what my first priority in life is...that is putting God first. If I say I put God first, guess what..business isn't second! It's my family, and business takes 3rd. To put my business before my family is wrong and immoral. When I'm not investing in my business, I'm investing in my children. After all is said and done and my time on earth is over, it's not the soul of my business that I can take with me, it's my children.
I'm with buckeye. Priorities are really tough to keep in line. Turning down the odd networking opportunity to be with your family doesn't betray a lack of commitment to your business. Turning down EVERY opportunity would be. It's all about balance. Besides, my family is most of the reason and incentive for my business. They are the reason I want to be a success.
I decide to work hard at business, work hard as a father, work hard as a husband, and do it all at the same time. Phew!
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